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3 lessons we learned from “He’s Just Not That Into You”

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3 lessons we learned from “He’s Just Not That Into You”

Pineapples Don't Have Sleeves

You can love them or hate them, but romantic comedies are here to stay. Sure, some of them create the most unrealistic standards for men and women, but others are just a good excuse for a good cry. So, let’s go back to 2009, when He’s Just Not That Into You came out, it was a standout for its A-list actors and fresh take on toxic and stereotypical relationships. And now, more than 10 years later, we couldn’t help but wonder (in a very Carrie Bradshaw voice) has the movie lived up to its full potential or it just became outdated?

The opening scene deserves an Oscar

From the first time we watched it until now writing this blog, we have been haunted by a single question: 

Are women really conditioned to believe that when a guy acts like an idiot, it is because he likes her?

Let’s face it, someone has probably fed you that line at least once in your life, and we all know how it usually turns out. Meanwhile, as women, we’re still criticized for being strong, confident, or successful. 

Here’s an example: Aren’t we sick of the Mr. Big archetype in our lives and ready to fall in the arms of the Adams? It’s 2023, Miley Cyrus’ Flowers and Karol G and Shakira’ TQG are topping the charts (with a #1 and #2 accordingly), two anthems about women who are being their unapologetic selves and are not afraid of speaking up. So breath in babe, feel it in the air, women are tired of acting out like dolls and are to burn their house (and ex’s) down.

And what does the first 20 minutes of the movie teach us? Take charge of your life, don’t be afraid to speak up, make the first move if you want to, and most importantly, don’t lower your standards. It’s time to raise the bar, ladies!

Are women lacking “game” or men need to be more straightforward?

Have we watched one too many rom-coms or have we become hopeless romantics who constantly excuse men’s behavior and rationalize bad acting instead of walking away? Yes, there are only straight couples in the movie, but unfortunately, nonsense is experienced by everyone regardless of gender or sexual orientation.

This year, we’re ready to take control and move beyond stupid games that classify us as “funny, cute, sexy or smart”, like agreeing to an excel sheet that evaluates our pros and cons.

We’re clearly living in a man’s world where marriage proposals, phone calls after a date, or even making the first move seem to be a man’s job. While we’re constantly labeled as clingy, needy or too sensitive, by…who? Who is setting the standards? Unless they want a remix of Session #53 (Shakira and Bizarrap collab), they better start understanding what we stand for:

  • We’re not sensitive…We’re connected with our feelings
  • We’re not complicated…We’re complex. We have substance!
  • We’re not weak…We’re just not afraid of vulnerability.

We’re taking control! Women are making waves in 2023, because they’re not afraid to speak their mind, even if “it splashes” some people in the face. Relationships look a lot different from those of our grandparents and parents, and there’s a reason why divorce rates and couple’s therapy are becoming more and more common.

Straight stereotypes belong in the trash

Is it about time we ditch the idea that women’s worth diminishes after turning 30, or do we still struggle to understand the concept of a happily single or childless woman? Perhaps we have been conditioned to believe that motherhood is the pinnacle of a woman’s life, but in reality, a woman is so much more than just a potential mother.

In all honesty, while we may love this classic, its characters have so little screen time that they have become one-dimensional stereotypes.

Think about it: The blonde hot yoga teacher in distress, the miserable man who never wanted to get married, the Monica Chandler-like who seems too controlling, and the desperate and cute guy who was rejected. Do you see a pattern? This might be true in some cases…but real life is much more complex than how these characters are making it look.  

Although He’s Just Not That Into You has some valid points about relationships, it didn’t get old as the perfect rom com, there are some clear outdated gender biases. But, if we’re fair with the genre, their depictions of love are usually kind of problematic, so as long as you understand they’re not a guidebook to follow, you can enjoy them for what they’re.

The perfect playlist of the 2000's

If you didn’t know already, we’re suckers for great music and a good soundtrack that complements a movie. So, if you’re a fan of Indie Rock and Catchy pop songs, you’re in for a treat in this movie. Featuring the iconic classic “Smile” by Lily Allen and one of our all time favorite romantic songs, “You Make It Real” by James Morrison, you’re gonna be using Shazam nonstop.

What sets He’s Just Not That Into You apart is not only its star-studded cast, but also its materful incorporation of every 2000’s song you need to know, while making sure the music creates an undertone for each scene. For instance, when Gigi is waiting impatiently for her date while you hear “If I never see your face again” or when in the most dramatic moment of the movie, “Somewhere only we know” by Keane is playing in the background.

Babe, that’s a wrap! This rom com is not perfect at all, from gender norms to iconic quotes, but we can’t resist Jennifer Connelly’s performance and the charm of Ginnifer Goodwin!

Pineapples Don't Have Sleeves

I want to officially introduce myself, I’m Pineapples Don’t Have Sleeves and I was born 6 years ago from the creative mind of a Colombian woman called Johanna Nodier who studied in Milan and Paris. We share our love for pineapples, wearing colors and dreaming with fantastical printed dresses. I’m a cosmopolita, yes baby, I’ve been to Milan, Bogotá, Aruba and Colombiamoda Fashion Week. I have always stood for women being whoever they want to be and breaking the rules of fashion. It’s so nice to meet you and welcome to my world!

Thank you for reading this article and being part of #GirlsTalk, cheers for learning and growing together!

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